Cheryl Cole, dubbed the nation’s sweetheart and possibly the most desirable female of the 20th century (actually she was voted sexiest woman in the world by FHM) but stunning and as close to being universally liked as you’re going to find, is releasing her sophomore album, Messy Little Raindrops.
My prediction, much like her first solo album 3 Words which went triple platinum and sold more than 900,000 copies, Messy Little Raindrops, will shift. But, again much like 3 Words, that doesn’t mean that it’s a musical masterpiece or even particularly memorable.
Upon first listening nothing really stands out. It’s no secret that Cheryl was never the voice of Girls Aloud, that was Nadine, and unfortunately her lack of vocal range isn’t disguised well enough by her master producer and BFF Will.i.am.
Never the less, there are a few passable singles on there, Let’s Get Down seems like an obvious single release, and her follow up single, the Flood, I’m sure will do well.
Something which irks me about this album though is how moping and glum the general tone is. Indeed we all watched as Cheryl cried her heart out talking to Piers Morgan about her failed marriage, being hounded by paparazzi and her close escape from malaria, but if this album is meant to be a new beginning from all that, it’s a poor attempt.
And indeed, the references to crying come thick and fast. In Happy Tears, Cheryl tells us “she’s never going to cry again unless they’re happy tears”, hardly shutting a door on her troublesome past. Similarly in Amnesia she tells us “things are too good to be true” and the thinly veiled Ashley digs don’t stop there, coming thick and fast from every angle.
I really did want to like this album, I love Cheryl, look at her for God’s sake, she’s got such lovely hair! And ever since she fixed her teeth it’s been a struggle to take your eyes off her, but I’m afraid it’s not enough to make me love what is at best a mediocre album.
If an unknown artist come out with this it wouldn’t have a shot at the top 10, but attach that smile, that hair and that lovely personality and it’s a hit. If you like this album, you’re more than likely to be liking Cheryl the TV personality, or Cheryl the clothes horse, not Cheryl the singer. If you want my opinion, I’d spend my money on the calendar or Cheryl branded eye lashes, not the album.
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